Have you ever felt like nothing really matters? Like nothing you do will ever make a difference and your life doesn’t mean anything? That everything is completely random and life is cruel and good people don’t get what they deserve?
It’s easy to feel this way, especially with everything that’s going on in the world right now. There are so many unpredictable and unfair things that happen, and there’s no hope that it will ever get better.
Additionally, sometimes we feel like we don’t matter when we’re in a depressive state and it’s very hard to be convinced otherwise. Or, we may be going through a personal crisis that shakes our faith.
So whether it’s from the latest terrorist attack, a natural disaster, a depressive episode, or a personal situation, the last thing on your mind is eating. When nothing matters, why should you bother nourishing yourself?
First off, things do matter. You matter. Your health matters. You may feel small in this giant world, but just by nature of being alive, you matter.
Even if you don’t have family or friends who depend on you or would be affected by your absence, your actions influence so many others and you have the potential to help others in small ways. Just by showing up and living your life and showing other people small kindnesses can make their day and prove that there is still good in this world.
You can’t help make things better if you don’t nourish yourself. If you’re feeling like nothing matters because of the state of the world, consider that it won’t get better if you just sit by and watch. In order to come to the aid of others, you must first aid yourself. You need to have enough energy to assist others, and in order to do that you must eat and take care of yourself.
Not eating doesn’t change the situation. Restricting food, not eating enough, or not eating a balanced diet can disrupt your emotions, causing you to feel even more imbalanced and uncertain. It’s so easy to use the presence or absence of food to numb our emotions and calm our anxieties. And it’s easy to say we can’t change because nothing matters.
But not eating properly doesn’t change the situation. It doesn’t cause us to feel more confident in our worthiness and it doesn’t cause us to feel more safe in the world we live in. It simply leads to further disordered eating. And when we’re not properly nourishing our bodies, we’re more prone to feel depression and anxiety, despite trying to run from those feelings.
Even though nothing may seem to matter, it does matter to nourish your body. It doesn’t have to be complicated. You don’t even need to cook. It just involves ensuring you are taking in at least 3 meals each day that includes a vegetable and/or fruit, a starch, and a protein source. It involves drinking water with meals and throughout the day. It will eventually involve gentle movement.
This is how you feel better. You go through the motions, even if it doesn’t necessarily make sense to you in the moment. Even if you still know, deep down, that nothing matters. You don’t have anything to lose and everything to gain.